Someone's in my seat

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dajop

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What are views on people just taking your pre-assigned seat just so they can sit together as a couple?

Last week I flew back from ZRH to SIN on SQ in J, and when I booked back in December allocated a particular bulkhead seat (11D). When I boarded an older lady was sitting in my allocated seat next to her husband. She was actually allocated 11K which is one of the windowless bulkhead seats at the side of the plane and is narrower, as it is where the plane narrows. This has happened to me one too many times, so insisted on the seat I had allocated as 11K is one of the less desirable seats on the plane. But in the process there was a lot of disapproving looks, tut-tutting and I was made to feel like a grade one a$@#hole.

To resolve the situation, I got onto expertflyer to check the seat map and noticed the rear bulkhead seats were showing as empty. I then physically went to check the seats were indeed empty. When I returned one of the senior SQ crew approached me requesting I change to a (normal, non bulkhead) seat a few rows back. I declined but suggested I would be happy to move back to the bulkhead in row 91. After checking they helped me move there. A couple of questions:
- Was I being a grade one a##hole by refusing the couples request? If there was no other seat I probably would have stood my ground. I try to be considerate of others, but when they are presumptuous it just rubs me up the wrong way. Furthermore why didn't they ask the person with empty seat beside them a few rows back to swap to the husbands bulkhead seat?
- Why, why why is it always the people who want to sit together that are not asked to move to an inferior seat? This has happened to me several times, and it's always me that gets asked to move to a non-bulkhead seat rather than moving the couple/travelling companions back to a non-bulkhead seat. Once on MH, I was asked to move from bulkhead and swap with someone further back, yet the seat of beside the person further back was empty - so the solution would have simply been to move the person sitting next me back. But oh no, not only do the people travelling together want to sit together they want to sit together in the best possible seats! (in this situation, the crew found a window bulkhead for me)

I know seats are only requests - but when you book them well in advance and board the plane with a boarding pass for the seat, it is the presumption you will be happy to take an inferior seat to accommodate a couple - rather than the other way around - that really annoys me.

Rant over.
 
I don't think you were being any more of a ahole than anyone else. I don't see a problem with anyone asking but not to just take it.

Like driving, you can grant right of way to another driver but you can't just take it. (unless you come from Sydney :mrgreen:)

Matt
 
If people ask for my permission then maybe I would agree if travelling as a solo or the seat change didn't split me from my partner. If they merely plonked themselves in my seat assuming my consent then I would want them moved.
This happened on a recent flight from Adelaide to Dubai recently. I had no concerns with my better judgement in insisting the stray person be removed from my seat. I got daggers but that wasn't my problem. Not sure why she thought she could displace me from my partner when I had organised the seating.
 
(1) You weren't being an coughhole.
(2) In any situation where someone wants another person's cooperation, compromise is key. It's unreasonable to want to sit together AND have the better seats. They should be prepared to trade one to get the other. Up to them to decide which is more important to them.
(3) Couples amuse me.
 
No you were not being an coughhole. The lady in your seat, however, was. Very poor form of the crew expecting you to move - it is probably considered a path of least resistance for/by them to do so (perhaps they had copped an earful from said lady prior to your boarding).

Anyone pre-occupying my seat (out of a sense of entitlement) has put themselves way way behind the 8 ball in any seat swap negotiations - very reluctant to help them in any way whatsoever. I guess in the end you have to do what the crew says, but you can certainly (politely but firmly) argue the point (not necessarily a pleasant experience, but then neither is an entitled scumbag poaching your pre-selected seat).
 
Not much to be contentious about here. If you want to reorganise seating onboard (after failing to do so while checking in), then you should :-

1. First sit in your allocated seat
2. Ask nicely until you get assent
3. Observe that if you offer a better seat in exchange for yours, then 2 is more likely
 
Not at all out of line.

I took a BA SYD-SIN flight a few years ago in W and had allocated an aisle of the middle bank of 4 seats. Upon boarding, a couple probably in their late 60's/early 70's were in the middle two seats. The woman said (in a very 'posh' accent) 'excuse me, my husband has just had knee surgery and we were wondering if you would mind swapping with him so he can have an aisle seat?' I declined and mentioned i'd requested this seat months ago. She then tried to persuade me by saying it would save me getting up to let him out frequently to walk around and stretch. I politely suggested that he could get out the other side every other time and she got shirty at me. I had not slept much the night before (was connecting into SYD on the 0600 out of MEL) and said to her "look, it's a 3pm flight. If you really knew that you needed an aisle seat for your husband, don't you think you should have either rung the airline, checked online for a seat or gotten to the airport earlier? I've had very little sleep and in all likelihood, i'm going to pass out for a good portion of the flight'. She gave me daggers for that, but I simply did not care. If you know you're going to have special requirements prior to travel, arrange them.

What made it even better was they were flying all the way through to LHR (as was I). In SIN upon re-boarding, the gate agent took my BP, crossed out my seating allocation and wrote '61 B' in big letters on it. Upon boarding, I had to walk through the W cabin and saw her, still giving me daggers (they'd boarded ahead of me, I may have been showering in the lounge too long). The look on her face as she saw me walk past and about face to go up the stairs was priceless :)
 
talking of aholes in seats, last Sunday I had the terrible experience of QF Mel to Syd travelling with the Sydney FC, who poceeded to sit anywhere in spite of the crew telling them to sit in their allocated seats. They just ignored her until she raised her voice and said did they know where to stand of the field, then know what number seat to sit in. One of them replied they were only dumb footballers, no kidding sherlock.

One flight I glas to get off ASAP.

Syndey FC = combined IQ of the number of rows on a 737.

Matt
 
Syndey FC = combined IQ of the number of rows on a 737.
Matt

Can you imagine how bad the Western Sydney Wanderers would be then? For a short period of time I seemed to be choosing the same seats over and over again (like 17A on an ATR SYD-CBR). On a few of those occassions I'd just sit there ...until the real 17A came along. Completely innocent, I'd just forget.
 
Can you imagine how bad the Western Sydney Wanderers would be then? For a short period of time I seemed to be choosing the same seats over and over again (like 17A on an ATR SYD-CBR). On a few of those occassions I'd just sit there ...until the real 17A came along. Completely innocent, I'd just forget.

The Wanderers would likely have some fans with flares to show the way.
 
You handled the situation a lot better than me.

If people are allocated seats apart and want to sit together they should always aim to sit together in the worst of the seats they were allocated. Never the best.

I am not giving up my seat for a worse seat. My comfort is more important than your desire to sit together. It really is that simple.

In saying that feel sorry for people who already had good seats allocated but split up apart due to selfishness or a computer glitch. Still taking my seat is not the solution.
 
I've had this happen before and it really annoys me. It's one thing to request a seat in advance, and understandably the request can be denied at check-in, however if you make it to the aircraft with a seating allocation on your BP then that really should be a done deal shouldn't it? If not, then I am in agreement with the many others who say you should not be asked to move to a worse seat to accommodate a couple.
 
Personally, I think it's just plain rude to sit in a seat that hasn't been allocated to you, regardless of the reason why. If anyone wishes to sit next to their partner or sit in a better seat, then at the very least have the courtesy to ask the person who has been allocated that seat before you start making yourself comfortable. I believe you had every right to ask the lady to move. The seat was allocated to you and she couldn't even be bothered to wait until you boarded to ask. Manners, it's just simple manners.
 
What are views on people just taking your pre-assigned seat just so they can sit together as a couple?

Last week I flew back from ZRH to SIN on SQ in J, and when I booked back in December allocated a particular bulkhead seat (11D). When I boarded an older lady was sitting in my allocated seat next to her husband. She was actually allocated 11K which is one of the windowless bulkhead seats at the side of the plane and is narrower, as it is where the plane narrows. This has happened to me one too many times, so insisted on the seat I had allocated as 11K is one of the less desirable seats on the plane. But in the process there was a lot of disapproving looks, tut-tutting and I was made to feel like a grade one a$@#hole.

To resolve the situation, I got onto expertflyer to check the seat map and noticed the rear bulkhead seats were showing as empty. I then physically went to check the seats were indeed empty. When I returned one of the senior SQ crew approached me requesting I change to a (normal, non bulkhead) seat a few rows back. I declined but suggested I would be happy to move back to the bulkhead in row 91. After checking they helped me move there. A couple of questions:
- Was I being a grade one a##hole by refusing the couples request? If there was no other seat I probably would have stood my ground. I try to be considerate of others, but when they are presumptuous it just rubs me up the wrong way. Furthermore why didn't they ask the person with empty seat beside them a few rows back to swap to the husbands bulkhead seat?
- Why, why why is it always the people who want to sit together that are not asked to move to an inferior seat? This has happened to me several times, and it's always me that gets asked to move to a non-bulkhead seat rather than moving the couple/travelling companions back to a non-bulkhead seat. Once on MH, I was asked to move from bulkhead and swap with someone further back, yet the seat of beside the person further back was empty - so the solution would have simply been to move the person sitting next me back. But oh no, not only do the people travelling together want to sit together they want to sit together in the best possible seats! (in this situation, the crew found a window bulkhead for me)

I know seats are only requests - but when you book them well in advance and board the plane with a boarding pass for the seat, it is the presumption you will be happy to take an inferior seat to accommodate a couple - rather than the other way around - that really annoys me.

Rant over.


Dajop, you were completely in the right. I would have not moved personally. They can move.

Now, if they had have asked politely, most likely I would have said yep, sure! But to be that presumptious (and I'll call it, rude) not a chance I would have moved. Let them and the crew sort it out.
 
Like the announcement says ... "Please take your assigned seats ...." I would have told her to clear out and not even tried to be accommodating by moving to another seat.
 
Personally, I think it's just plain rude to sit in a seat that hasn't been allocated to you, regardless of the reason why. If anyone wishes to sit next to their partner or sit in a better seat, then at the very least have the courtesy to ask the person who has been allocated that seat before you start making yourself comfortable. I believe you had every right to ask the lady to move. The seat was allocated to you and she couldn't even be bothered to wait until you boarded to ask. Manners, it's just simple manners.

Problem is, I've seen a pax approach their seat only to be intercepted by an FA and redirected to a new seat because "bloke 1 and bloke 2 wanted to sit together, so youre now over there". Not cool at all to make the swap without the pax present.

Another pax then tried to convince either JessicaTam or myself to move, because we were "travelling together and must sit together" even though we were both very happy with our chosen window seats.
 
Problem is, I've seen a pax approach their seat only to be intercepted by an FA and redirected to a new seat because "bloke 1 and bloke 2 wanted to sit together, so youre now over there". Not cool at all to make the swap without the pax present.

Another pax then tried to convince either JessicaTam or myself to move, because we were "travelling together and must sit together" even though we were both very happy with our chosen window seats.

Definitely not cool to make the swap without the person present, and I question why the FA needs to 'intervene' because someone asked to sit together. Unless it was for 'safety' purposes, I think I'd get a bit annoyed if I'd selected a particular seat, was allocated that seat on my BP and was then 'told' onboard that I had to move because someone else wanted to sit next to a friend/partner/colleague. I have actually asked before (long time ago) when flying J from LHR - SIN with BA. We were allocated BP's with one seat on the lower deck and one on the upper deck. Asked at the lounge if there was anyone flying solo that might be interested in the better seat (upper deck) so we could be seated together in the same cabin. Took a little while to work out, but a lovely lady was more than happy to move and we really appreciated it. No way would I have walked the cabin asking people to move so I could sit with my partner. If it couldn't be arranged beforehand, then I would have left it as it was.

Your story is interesting though - again, why should you have to sit together if you've chosen seats that you're happy with and have your BP's issued with those seats? Gotta love the pax's line of thinking though - he obviously wanted one of those window seats, so instead of playing the 'I want that seat' card, played the 'ladies, I'm sure you want to sit together and I'm more than happy to move' card.
 
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If I am asked nicely, you weren't forcing yourself into my preassigned seat, I get an equivalent or better seat I'd be happy to oblige.
Also if you're swapped to accommodate your needs please thank the person genuinely, nothing worse than moving for someone who doesn't even thank you!

Recently I took a Qatar flight a340 cmb-doh in J we were allocated middle bulkhead seats in J with bassinet, at last minute our plane was subbed for a 777, upon boarding we noticed the middle J seats on 777 didn't have bassinet. Uh oh with a 5 month old in toe this could be a problem. I politely asked them through the csm if they would mind swapping so we could have a bassinet seat but only if they wanted too. They were only too happy to move add we had asked nicely and not put pressure for them to move, we thanked them profusely.
 
You handled the situation a lot better than me.

My expertflyer subscription proved invaluable, once again. I know from years of experience with SQ - that problem solving is not a core skill of their ground and cabin staff - so took it on myself to come up with an acceptable solution for all concerned. But just glad there was an acceptable solution!
 
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