I sympathise and I hope you get your points. Hopefully VirginAustralia will be able to help. I think a problem this complicated will need more than the frontline staff to deal with it. The mess suggests that the back office processes are far from automated and that people are pushing bits of paper round the back office (and maybe losing some of them in the process).
In your case haydensydney, it would seem as if Etihad have just looked up your name on their computer, found an existing customer with your name and given them the points. Not ideal!
In may case, the points credited on 22 June (for a flight on 3 May), after multiple attempts to correspond with VA through the retro email, gold email and PMing VirginAustralia from FlyerTalk. The points credited 24 hours after I had emailed VirginAustralia following a PM exchange, but I do not know if the credit was due to the PM, the email to VirginAustralia l that followed, it or one of the emails to gold and retro preceeding it. None of the emails have been answered for the last month (I appreciate VA have had a fee issues to deal with, but I think they could at least autorespond to emails).
And then on 29 June I got two emails from Velocity - one for the return date of the flight which I have obviously not flown, and one for the outward, both saying that they could not find any flight activity. Now there clearly was flight activity on the outward as I was on the plane, my number is on the BP and it shows up as Velocity Gold, and the points have credited to my account. And there has clearly not been on the return, as the flight is on a future date! So either the process is so automated that no-one actually reviews these emails before they are sent, or the people who send the emails so bored/clueless that they do not even read what they are sending and check that the flight dates are not in the future, and that the points have not already showed up in the flyer's account (which you would think they would do, in case retro claims ever result in a double credit). And as my original email is of course not appended below the email I received, I can't tell to which of my emails they are responding to. Not good enough really!
But the most insulting thing in the emails from gold is yet again a reminder to be sure to quote the Velocity number when booking and a request to send the BP and e-ticket receipts in. Well I did put my number in the booking, as is evidenced by my Velocity number and status being on the BP, and I sent the BP and ETR scans in with my first emails to gold and retro, which they seem to ignore. I have pointed this out to them in my replies, which they also seem to ignore.
I am due to fly back on under 2 weeks and I am afraid I have no faith in the system crediting me the points.
Hopefully VA can sort out these processes with all its codeshare partners - if so, I might be crediting my SQ miles to VA in the future. If not I will be sticking firmly with Star Alliance crediting when flying SQ, and I will probably not book an EY/VA codeshare again.