A bit of humour

[tgh]

 

[drron]

.

.

.

 

[NM]

Reporter: How do you motivate your employees to be punctual?

Company Owner: It's simple. I have 100 employees, and 99 free parking spaces. The other one costs $50 a day.

 

[codash1099]

When I was a kid, we were so poor that my parents could only afford a second hand calculator, which had the ‘X’ button missing.

Times were hard.

 

[codash1099]

 

[straitman]

 

[TheRealTMA]

"my laundry machine uses gigabytes of traffic every day" is another one of those fun things we can say now that we live in The Future™ pic.twitter.com/yiYSPKqoke

— Zach Holman (@holman) April 9, 2021

 

[VPS]

Poor piggy

 

[TheRealTMA]

 

[Flashback]

View attachment 244397

I thought I had posted that but maybe not, must have been in one of my WhatsApp groups.

Yes, not long now........

One way road to beer - The lockdown countdown to freedom!

From beer in the park with one friend, to beer anywhere with everyone... Here's the definitive countdown to the four stages on the 'one-way road to freedom'.

onewayroadtobeer.com

Beer in a beer garden, with five friends​

01DAYS
18HOURS
15MINS
38SECONDS

 

[Hvr]

 

[TheRealTMA]

I thought I had posted that but maybe not, must have been in one of my WhatsApp groups.

Yes, not long now........

One way road to beer - The lockdown countdown to freedom!

From beer in the park with one friend, to beer anywhere with everyone... Here's the definitive countdown to the four stages on the 'one-way road to freedom'.

onewayroadtobeer.com

Beer in a beer garden, with five friends​

01DAYS
18HOURS
15MINS
38SECONDS

Maybe! It came from a friend in Newcastle in lockdown.

 

[Flashback]

Maybe! It came from a friend in Newcastle in lockdown.

Funnily enough that is pretty close to where we will be when lockdown is lifted

 

[codash1099]

 

[jonboixxx]

A farmer goes out and buys a new, young rooster. As soon as he brings him home, the young rooster rushes and screws all 150 of the farmers hens. The farmer is impressed.
At lunchtime, the young rooster again screws all 150 hens. The farmer is not just impressed anymore, he is worried.

Next morning, not only is the rooster screwing the hens but he is screwing the turkeys, ducks even the cow.

Later farmer looks out into the barnyard and finds the rooster stretched out, limp as a rag, his eyes closed, dead and vultures circling overhead. The farmer runs out, looks down at the young roosters limp body and says: "You deserved it, you horny cough!"

The young rooster opens one eye, points up at the vultures with his wing, and says, "Shhhh, they are about to land."

 

[TheRealTMA]

Greeting Friends

Directed by M. Night Shyamalan pic.twitter.com/WCHDZIBTv2

— James Felton (@JimMFelton) April 12, 2021

 

[TheRealTMA]

Paddy says, "Mick, I'm thinking of buying a Labrador."

”Bugger that!" says Mick. "Have you seen how many of their owners go blind?"

 

[jonboixxx]

 

[Hvr]

 

[Hvr]