A bit of humour

[p--and--t]

 

[p--and--t]

 

[Flashback]

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Well you wouldn't want to sit on it ...... or would you?

 

[p--and--t]

Well you wouldn't want to sit on it ...... or would you?

Its meant to be a spoon (as opposed to a fork) in the road

 

[Flashback]

Its meant to be a spoon (as opposed to a fork) in the road

Yes, looks like something else though!

 

[Ansett]

.

 

[p--and--t]

 

[Ansett]

.

 

[p--and--t]

 

[prozac]

 

[Hvr]

 

[NM]

I asked the surgeon if I could administer my own anesthetic. He said, “Go ahead. Knock yourself out.”

 

[p--and--t]

 

[p--and--t]

 

[p--and--t]

 

[p--and--t]

 

[Hvr]

My nerdy friend got a PhD on the history of palindromes.
We call him Dr Awkward.

 

[Hvr]

Last night on Dancing with the Tsars, Peter and Catherine were great. Ivan was terrible.

 

[Hvr]

Why did Napoleon conquer so much land?

Because he didn't have much Toulouse.

 

[p--and--t]

Upon arriving home, a husband was met at the door by his sobbing wife.
Tearfully she explained, "It's the pharmacist. He insulted me terribly this morning on the phone. I had to call multiple times before he would even answer the phone."
Immediately, the husband drove downtown to confront the pharmacist and demand an apology.
Before he could say more than a word or two, the pharmacist told him, "Now, just a minute, listen to my side of it”.
“This morning the alarm failed to go off, so I was late getting up. I went without breakfast and hurried out to the car, just to realize that I'd locked the house with both house and car keys inside and had to break a window to get my keys."
"Then, driving a little too fast, I got a speeding ticket. Later, when I was about three blocks from the store, I had a flat tire."
"When I finally got to the store a bunch of people were waiting for me to open up. I got the store opened and started waiting on these people, all the time the darn phone was ringing off the hook."
He continued, "Then I had to break a roll of pennies against the cash register drawer to make change, and they spilled all over the floor. I had to get down on my hands and knees to pick up the coins and the phone was still ringing.”
“When I came up I cracked my head on the open cash drawer, which made me stagger back against a showcase with a bunch of perfume bottles on it. Half of them hit the floor and broke."
"Meanwhile, the phone is still ringing with no let up, and I finally got back to answer it. It was your wife. She wanted to know how to use a rectal thermometer.”
“And believe me mister, all I did was tell her!”