A bit of humour

[p--and--t]

 

[p--and--t]

Once again this year, I’ve had requests for my Bourbon Christmas Cake recipe so here goes.

Please keep in your files as I am beginning to get tired of typing this up every year! (Made mine this morning!!!!) 1 cup sugar, 1 tsp. baking powder, 1 cup water, 1 tsp. salt , 1 cup brown sugar, Lemon juice, 4 large eggs, Nuts, 1 bottle bourbon, 2 cups dried fruit.

Sample a cup of bourbon to check quality.

Take a large bowl, check the bourbon again to be sure it is of the highest quality then Repeat. Turn on the electric mixer. Beat one cup of butter in a large fluffy bowl. Add 1 teaspoon of sugar. Beat again.

At this point, it is best to make sure the bourbon is still OK. Try another cup just in case.

Turn off the mixerer thingy. Break 2 eegs and add to the bowl and chuck in the cup of dried fruit. Pick the fruit up off the floor, wash it and put it in the bowl a piece at a time trying to count it. Mix on the turner. If the fried druit gets stuck in the beaterers, just pry it loose with a drewscriver Sample the bourbon to test for tonsisticity.

Next, sift 2 cups of salt, or something. Check the bourbon . Now shift the lemon juice and strain your nuts. Add one table. Add a spoon of sugar, or somefink. Whatever you can find. Greash the oven. Turn the cake tin 360 degrees and try not to fall over. Don't forget to beat off the turner. Finally, throw the bowl through the window.

Finish the bourbon and wipe the counter with the cat.....

 

[NM]

 

[Buzzard]

If it works, it's a.....

 

[p--and--t]

 

[TonyDoh]

 

[Blackadder]

 

[Blackadder]

 

[prozac]

View attachment 414992

Can't read these postage stamps

 

[p--and--t]

 

[p--and--t]

I just came across this today - our space agency acronym

 

[SuePa]

So, is the logo saying, ' up your ar..' ?

 

[p--and--t]

A couple was Christmas shopping at the mall on Christmas Eve and the mall was packed.
As the wife walked through the mall she was surprised to look up and see
her husband was nowhere around. She was quite upset because they had a lot to do.
Because she was so worried, she called him on her mobile phone to ask him where he was.
In a calm voice, the husband said, "Honey, you remember the jewelry store we went into
about 5 years ago where you fell in love with that diamond necklace that we could not afford
and I told you that I would get it for you one day?"
The wife choked up and started to cry and said, "Yes, I remember that jewelry store."
He said, "Well, I'm in the bar right next to it."

 

[SYD]

I just came across this today - our space agency acronym

View attachment 415022View attachment 415023

Been around for a while and obviously taking the pi$$.

 

[NM]

 

[p--and--t]

Boarding for your flight will be delayed….

 

[Hvr]

Boarding for your flight will be delayed….

You're not lyin'!
One hopes that the Li-ion batteries are fully charged.

 

[prozac]

You're not lyin'!
One hopes that the Li-ion batteries are fully charged.

And the engines roar into life
Looks like they are on the mane runway

 

[DejaBrew]

Boarding for your flight will be delayed….

View attachment 415038

Blue Sky Aviation - the pride of the African skies.

 

[NM]

You're not lyin'!
One hopes that the Li-ion batteries are fully charged.

If not, it would be a big cat-astrophy in the mane cabin