I humbly disagree that there is a greater downside to breaking the QF shackles here. But it depends on how wedded the OP is to chasing points, award flights, upgrades, etc. And how profoundly disgusted she is with QF. For me, I was not heavily into the former (but still 'hooked'), and extremely fed up with QF. With that mindset, a change of alliance to Star (and a single-alliance mindset rather than single-airline mindset), plus a BFOD mentality, made me a much happier flyer. And mostly my international flight options are vastly increased compared to the contracted QF network. The feeling that I was being ripped off / suckered / addicted every time I stepped on a (QF) plane was gone. I do sometimes fly domestically with QF if it suits me, but that would cease if VA joined Star.
Okay, but by your own admission you have not decided to "never to do business with Qantas again", which is what you suggested to the OP. Just to be clear, I certainly wasn't suggesting that the OP should "shackle" herself to QF - just that she would be very unwise to rule QF/partners out.
If you're just suggesting that the OP should give preference to other airlines as long as she doesn't lose out by doing so, that's absolutely fair enough.
The fact is, it has become much harder to earn SQ/VA points in recent times (primarily due to credit card changes), so I would say completely ruling out QFF as a way to get award flights would be a very big call to make.
QF/partners also offer some routes that are not available with VA/*A etc, and believe it or not, there are times when QF has the cheapest fares. I know that it can often be the other way around too, but you say you have a BFOD mentality, and the concept of excluding any airline/alliance from your options is completely inconsistent with a BFOD mentality. I have to book work flights on a BFOD basis (to an extent - i.e. I can ignore LCCs), and the amount of travel I have done with QF in recent years has increased dramatically, from almost none a couple of years back to enough to get me to Platinum now. Plus of course if you were adhering to BFOD in the strict sense, it would be relatively hard to completely avoid JQ.
I would stick to my previous advice - don't cut yourself off from a whole raft of options over a grudge. It's just not worth it, and the airline won't care.