Weighty Issues with Qantas

[rogerkambah]

It's always the fat people that are against the idea of a "100kg" per passenger allowance or similar

Must admit 100kg wouldn't work for me at 84kg, but combined with my 50kg wife, 200kg would be easy peasy. I'll have to keep taking her with me when I travel.

 

[Captain Halliday]

I'm tempted to weigh in, but the weight of expectation not to offend is great. Best I just go on my weigh (sic)...

 

[JessicaTam]

I'm tempted to weigh in, but the weight of expectation not to offend is great. Best I just go on my weigh (sic)...

I can think of a tonne of replies, but would hate to tip the scales against me.

 

[AL1CE]

Sorry have to disagree, they do have a choice, and depending on their mood that day it's either a win or loose. I've had it happen to me countless times and in the end majority let you through, with one or two needing a token lightening of the bag.

 

[JohnK]

It's always the fat people that are against the idea of a "100kg" per passenger allowance or similar

When we start treating people like cattle or sheep then perhaps your argument will hold some weight.

For now we are paying to sit in a seat and if I can stay within my seat it shouldn't concern anyone how much I weigh.

P.S. I do not think any mainstream airline would be game enough to try it.

 

[grnorton]

thank you. Its my first post! I was surprised at some of the responses which did not seem to latch on to the fact that it was tongue in cheek to what I still believe was a farcical interaction. The replies are all understandable , but quite simply I was totally gobsmacked by the initial request that I was lost for words and just went with the flow to see where it would lead. I am an extremely laid back chap and did not want to become involved in an open air altercation. IF the person had simply explained the reason telling me that it was related to the weight restriction on the overhead bins, that would have been a great start. As it was I was left feeling totally inadequate, guilty as charged and embarrassed.

The writing and references to the age of the representative reflect a certain degree of literary licence and alliteration - again I had hoped that the average reader would have at least understood this BUT I also accept that it was and is not entirely "PC"!

I had a another aviation moment the next day IN New Zealand..

The plane to Bay of Islands is a twin engine Beechcraft turboprop. It’s small. As the advertisements proclaim “every seat is a window seat” and the coughpit is visible from the cabin. No security doors in New Zealand.
My attempts to check in at the self service kiosk failed repeatedly. I was told that my flight could not be verified – “please approach an Air New Zealand staff member”. Still recovering and probably permanently scarred from approaching the Qantas staff member 24 hours previously, I faltered. With a stammer and Tourette like twitch of the right eye, I gingerly accosted a nearby “customer service agent”. She was genuinely surprised at the fact that I could not check in and led me to another terminal. Her first step was to reboot the computer – – I saw the immediate logic of this as the system was running Microsoft Windows. Whilst we waited for the system to come up, we chatted and watched 5 international flights depart for Sydney, Santiago, Hong Kong, Tokyo and Los Angeles.
Eventually, somewhat breathlessly she explained that whilst I was booked on the flight and had a seat, 9A to be precise, I was nevertheless “on standby”. Now the logic or rather lack of it with respect to this statement was within a cat’s whisker of the previous day’s weight conundrum with a Qantas customer service agent.
Perhaps picking up on my incredulity and I suspect with a degree of empathy, she adopted a professional manner and opined that sometimes, thankfully rarely, there are issues with “load” and this involves a complex relationship between fuel and weight. God I thought , she has ESP and knows that I was stumped by a simple Qantas 2Kg load shift. So she assumes that she has me well and truely by the mathematical balls! And she had! All sorts of visions flashed before me. Would it help if, rather than taking out 2kg, I left the whole bag behind? Should I amputate a leg?
Then, recovering my composure somewhat, I took stock of the situation. My Tourette like tic had settled into mild vocalizations – a cross between a sniff and a sob. It was then that the penny dropped as I surveyed the rest of the passengers. There were 14 and 6 were either second cousins of the King of Tonga OR a contingent from the local TV production of “Tonga’s Biggest Loser” – of course I did entertain the thought they could have been both! Distinctly possible and indeed plausible as I am led to believe that the King of Tonga owns the local TV company.
Anyway, the flight was called, all 14 including the Tongan contingent, boarded. I sat patiently trying at once to appear obvious yet elfin like. Without being forced to divest myself of anything, I was given a boarding pass. The 6 South Sea Islanders were seated in the centre of the plane, 3 on each side, essentially spread out equally over the aircraft’s centre of gravity. I sat towards the aft surrounded by 3 empty seats!
The flight took 45 minutes, flying at about 15000 feet over breathtaking scenery. I confess that I did not enjoy the moment, as my mind constantly threw up images of the aeronautical consequences of a Tongan call of nature. Should the passenger in seat 4A suddenly arise and head for the toilet situated in the very back of the plane, firstly there is the distinct possibility that he could not squeeze into the cubicle and secondly, should he do so with any alacrity, the aircraft would go into a sudden pitch – nose up attitude. The consequences of this on an unprepared pilot, would be a “stall situation”. The nose would drop and the plane would nose dive down, drop a wing and our Tongan King’s cousin would be unceremoniously thrown off the throne, rolling with increasing momentum towards the coughpit and it’s open door….! It would be a unique aviation catastrophe, not helped by the “black box”, which has not yet developed the capacity to record that both pilots were unable to respond to the crisis due to suffocation.
Qantas gets it’s knickers in a knot about 2 Kg, whilst Air New Zealand, justifiably gets concerned about 200kg.
To this day I have no clue as to why I was asked to wait and board last.

 

[get me outta here]

Too late to attempt to hide behind the 'PC' comment as some try to thinking it shields them, or, "it was a joke why didn't you see that", when their 'joke' is on someone else.

 

[Denali]

Oh goodie. I see its going to be a pick on fat people thread day.

If my fat butt fits in the seat that I paid for and Im not touching the person next to me (because I get J or the aisle and happily stick my gym built but fit/90kg husband in the middle if its Y) then the skinnier people can shut the heck up and hopefully find something else to cough about.

Although it reminds me of a hopper flight in PNG once with lots of big miners and scuba divers with equipment and this tall skinny local got off the plane because of weight issues. Im pretty sure he weighed less than some of the carry on and he wasn't even wearing shoes.

And for OPs NZ flight. Its NZ, of course you are going to see big maori's and islanders. Geez, ever seen the local under 14s footy team, some are giants.

 

[Pushka]

If you are an FF then I'm surprised you didn't realise the request was all about the weight put into the overhead lockers.

As for the descriptors you've used I'm not convinced by the explanation.

 

[Denali]

^^ I know this but people are already touching on fat butt in seats and mass weight per passenger topics, hence the 100kg per person post and OPs Tonga size reference.

For the overheads, a few times Ive sat there and done the figures because Ive seen lots of various sized bags shoved into the one overhead on top of eachother and Ive wondered what exactly is the breakage point. I now weigh my husband carryon, ever since he once smuggled in a 23kg photography backpack. I also carry a small pull out/collapsible bag so if we get caught being 2kgs over, not that it happens often anymore, I can quickly disperse the weight ratio and avoid check in.

 

[smit0847]

Here we go again.....

 

[harvyk]

thank you. Its my first post! I was surprised at some of the responses which did not seem to latch on to the fact that it was tongue in cheek to what I still believe was a farcical interaction. <snip>

Word to the wise when posting on forums, using non-verbal communication means that you miss out on all the little hints and tips which face to face communication give. Things like true intent never come across exactly as you imagined it in your head. If you are planning on making a post a little light hearted use things like emoticons -> <- to give the reader some clue as to the seriousness of the post.

It takes a very skilled writer and it takes time (something that most people don't put into their posts) to convey emotion using writing alone, and this rule applies doubly so when it's a touchy subject such as weight, especially when it's only a short hop skip and jump to something controversial like a "fat tax".

Whilst you don't have to be on here to make friends, it's never a good look to have your first post be one which is likely to get a whole lot of people off-side.

 

[Pushka]

I think it's the first post thing. None of us know if you are a joker or not.

 

[medhead]

It was entirely possible to write a funny post about the situation without resorting to comparisons with a large person at the next counter. It is simply not relevant to the story. Your own 83kg comparison conveys the humour, alone. Unless you're trying to vindicate why you were a victim of incompetence or stupidity. In which I have to again ask why you didn't just remove something and put it back in later. That would've avoided the whole victim aspect.

Oh and it is highly dubious to suggest there is any risk to the structural integrity of the overhead lockers.

 

[RooFlyer]

I think it's the first post thing. None of us know if you are a joker or not.

Not for sure ... but even without emoticons (which are a good idea) there were a few hints there. .... ....

I'm overweight, and embarrassed about it, but not the least offended by anything on this thread. Even the PC stuff.