A bit of humour

The inventor of the computer mouse has died.
They should have right clicked and saved him.


OMG. I just found out '50 Shades of Grey' is some kind of erotic book.
I had just assumed it was the weather forecast for July
 
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I made a typing mistake when trying to upload a calendar app to my phone.

I ended up with a colander app.

All it does is drain the battery.

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A bird of prey has started nesting at the bottom of our garden. It doesn't do anything during the day,but I've noticed its very active at night especially when i start playing 80's pop music.

Our-kestrel-maneuvers-in-the-dark.

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I've just laid a chicken proof lawn.
Its impeccable

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One night a blonde teenage girl brought her new boyfriend home to meet her parents, and they were appalled by his appearance: leather jacket, motorcycle boots, tattoos, and pierced nose. Later, the parents pulled their daughter aside and confessed their concern.

“Dear,” said the mother diplomatically, “he just doesn’t seem very nice.”

“Mum,” replied the daughter, “if he wasn’t nice, why would he be doing 5000 hours of community service?”

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Sick of cliques?
Join the club

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The only thing I take seriously in the newspapers today is fish and chips.

And even that, I take with a pinch of salt.
 

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