A bit of humour

[tgh]

We need a head slap emogi.

Otoh,, if we did have such an implement Hvr would have been beaten to a pulp many times

 

[VPS]

Kiss in Vienna - not sure if this is true or not but they are currently in Austria

 

[TheRealTMA]

Kiss in Vienna - not sure if this is true or not but they are currently in Austria

View attachment 283294

Seems to be!

Kiss mistake Australian flag for Austrian flag at concert in Vienna

The nine thousand Kiss fans in attendance roared with laughter when the message appeared during the closing moments of the concert, reports Today Times Live

www.dailymail.co.uk

 

[Major]

 

[TheRealTMA]

From Facebook.

It happened at a New York Airport. This is hilarious. I wish I had the guts of this girl. An award should go to the United

Airlines gate agent in New York for being smart and funny, while making her point, when confronted with a passenger who probably

deserved to fly as cargo. For all of you out there who have had to

deal with an irate customer, this one is for you.

A crowded United Airlines flight was canceled. A single agent was re-booking a long line of inconvenienced travelers.

Suddenly, an angry passenger pushed his way to the desk. He slapped his ticket on the counter and said, "I HAVE to be on this flight and it has to be FIRST CLASS."

The agent replied, "I'm sorry, sir. I'll be happy to try to help you, but I've got to help these folks first; and then I'm sure we'll be able to work something out."

The passenger was unimpressed. He asked loudly, so that

the passengers behind him could hear, "DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA WHO I AM?"

Without hesitating, the agent smiled and grabbed her public address microphone. "May I have your attention, please?", she began, her voice heard clearly throughout the terminal. "We have a passenger here at Gate 14 WHO DOES NOT KNOW WHO HE IS. If anyone can help him with his identity, please come to Gate 14".

With the folks behind him in line laughing hysterically,

the man glared at the United Airlines agent, gritted his teeth, and said, "cough* You!"

Without flinching, she smiled and said, "I'm sorry sir,

you'll have to get in line for that, too."

 

[prozac]

From Facebook.

It happened at a New York Airport. This is hilarious. I wish I had the guts of this girl. An award should go to the United

Airlines gate agent in New York for being smart and funny, while making her point, when confronted with a passenger who probably

deserved to fly as cargo. For all of you out there who have had to

deal with an irate customer, this one is for you.

A crowded United Airlines flight was canceled. A single agent was re-booking a long line of inconvenienced travelers.

Suddenly, an angry passenger pushed his way to the desk. He slapped his ticket on the counter and said, "I HAVE to be on this flight and it has to be FIRST CLASS."

The agent replied, "I'm sorry, sir. I'll be happy to try to help you, but I've got to help these folks first; and then I'm sure we'll be able to work something out."

The passenger was unimpressed. He asked loudly, so that

the passengers behind him could hear, "DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA WHO I AM?"

Without hesitating, the agent smiled and grabbed her public address microphone. "May I have your attention, please?", she began, her voice heard clearly throughout the terminal. "We have a passenger here at Gate 14 WHO DOES NOT KNOW WHO HE IS. If anyone can help him with his identity, please come to Gate 14".

With the folks behind him in line laughing hysterically,

the man glared at the United Airlines agent, gritted his teeth, and said, "cough* You!"

Without flinching, she smiled and said, "I'm sorry sir,

you'll have to get in line for that, too."

An oldie but a goodie.

 

[mrs.dr.ron]

This one is for @princessfiona

 

[ethernet]

AS I get older I've discovered two things:

1. My memory's not as sharp as it used to be.
2. My memory's not as sharp as it used to be.

Reminds me of a MAD magazine posting for Ads we would like to see
'Amazing memory tricks -memorize everything, forget nothing'
Call (phone number blank forgotten/missing).

 

[ethernet]

And this SNL clip Total B* airlines

 

[Happy Trails]

A kind neighbour gave me a lime from her garden, but...


... I'm gonna need a bigger bottle of gin.

 

[Major]

 

[prozac]

A kind neighbour gave me a lime from her garden, but...
View attachment 283459

... I'm gonna need a bigger bottle of gin.
View attachment 283460

You know what she is doing at night...

 

[prozac]

Did you know that Dubai don't like The Flintstones, but Abu Dhabi do?

 

[Hvr]

The other day I went for a walk down a road where the houses were numbered 64k, 128k, 256k, 512k and 1gig.

It was a trip down memory lane.

++++++++++++++

What do you call a women in the middle of a tennis court?

Annette

++++++++++++

Following a spate of thefts of cement mixers from building sites the police were called.
After initial investigations a Police spokesperson said, 'At the moment they've got nothing concrete to go on'

 

[Hvr]

 

[Hvr]

WHAT do you call a Magician who has lost his Magic?

Ian

++++++++++++++++++++

A factory which makes prosthetic limbs for obese amputees was broken into last night.


Police are looking for two heavily armed men.

 

[AisleSeat]

Flight attendant: Will you be having dinner?
Passenger: What are the choices?
Flight attendant: Yes or no

 

[Captain Halliday]

https://twitter.com/x/status/1542650344182009856

 

[VPS]

English courses

 

[prozac]