A DYKWIA Trapped in Blighty

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This webinar malarkey is all rather fun. I can sit in my favourite armchair, in my favourite smoking jacket, and talk at to the world. Who knew? Griselda has not yet told me how much money I have made though. My assumption is that most of the world has been listening so it will be a princely sum. :p

After three full weeks in what everyone appears to be calling “lockdown” I’m rather enjoying my avoidance of the general public. One does get the opportunity to leave one’s country estate for shopping, medical needs, and exercise. I haven’t had recourse to seek medical assistance, unless you count Coates Plymouth Gin, Navy Strength, but that can be procured from something called Tesco. (Fortnum & Mason has yet to reach East Anglia.) By coincidence one of the estate farmers, from a good 2 metres distance away, told me that all of the sheep in the fields around the Great Hall have also gone to Tesco. (I do find that a little odd, quite why sheep would go to Tesco is beyond me.) ⁉

The lack of a butler, and for that matter house maid, not to mention valet, means I take my daily exercise in the form of mixing Dry Martini’s, I didn’t realise just how strenuous it is. 🍸

The BBC sent quite a forceful, you might even say frightfully nasty, communique to Griselda this week, it was in the form of a cease and desist notification. Apparently the thirty seven program ideas I have submitted over the last three weeks have all been rejected, some low level lackey believes there isn’t the taste for TV game shows subjecting journalists and celebrities to varying types of extreme torture. Not for the first time I find myself closer to public sentiment than the BBC commissioning editors who, in their ivory towers, are clearly unaware of the daily torture being inflicted upon the public by celebrities and journalists.

It is not all doom and gloom though, I read an article in The Times, which is now published in tabloid format* would you believe, on the demise of social influencers. I had no idea what a social influencer was until I read the article but having done so I can’t help but think that their collective demise will only improve humanity. :p

There are rumblings in the media of a reduction in “lockdown” restrictions in the coming weeks. Griselda has penned several letters to the government requesting that the roles of valet, butler and maid being classified as essential. I suspect sense will finally return to Government this week with the return of that Johnson chap. I think he will treat Griselda’s requests as a priority and fast track them into legislation, whilst admonishing the dreadful grammar school types unable to recognise what essential services are. :p

TTFN

*At least The Sunday Times is still published in broadsheet format.
 
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I would have posted earlier, but absolutely nothing of any significance has hastened since April......until now. o_O

The sheep in the field behind the orangery have gone and potatoes have been planted instead.

I am still yet to see a single cheque for my half hour webinars either.

For those concerned about my welfare Griselda has managed to organise First Class flights back to Australia in October - assuming Victoria is not in lockdown!
 
I would have posted earlier, but absolutely nothing of any significance has hastened since April......until now. o_O

The sheep in the field behind the orangery have gone and potatoes have been planted instead.

I am still yet to see a single cheque for my half hour webinars either.

For those concerned about my welfare Griselda has managed to organise First Class flights back to Australia in October - assuming Victoria is not in lockdown!
Having both yourself and JohnK re-appear within 24hrs has set a lot of minds at rest! :)

Did you eat any of the sheep, or was that left for the poor villagers? ;)
 
Hmm, might not be able to fly directly to MEL. I don't think they'll be accepting international travellers flying directly to MEL for a few more months.
Ha, he will probably have to go through his most dreaded airport - SYD!!!!
 
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Worryingly since the seed potatoes were lifted way back in September (Actually it could have been July or October, or for that matter August - time has rather blurred over the last six months.) the field I view from my state room at the ancestral pile has been left to fallow. I say worryingly because here in the East Anglian Fens the rich, peaty, soil usually produces three crops per year. I was hoping for Brussel Sprouts in time for Christmas but alas I had to make due with a delivery from something called Ocado. The staff had apparently been able to organise this via the typewriter with a screen.

The shortages here are shocking. Grange cannot be found anywhere in East Anglia, I believe I have consumed all of the Bin 389 in the United Kingdom and am now reduce to Bin 28 - even that is now in short supply. I am contemplating having the staff build a still in one of the outhouses if things get worse.
 
I say old chap - have you had the jab ?
Now that is a good question. I do need to register with a GP this week. I fear it will be March before I am called.....and another thing the weekly lateral flow test is all rather annoying. Mother, dearest, received hers 9 days ago. Astonishingly it was all well organised and very efficient. Two things one does not associate with what I am legally obliged to refer to as "our" NHS.
 
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Great to hear from you TH.Glad to see that with all the disasters and the deprivation that you have had you are still adhering to that superb English tradition of the stiff upper lip.
 
Griselda tells me there is to be a Hilton in Melbourne - opening March 2021 - have I missed this news on AFF?

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