Quotable Quotes

[Major]

'It has been said that politics is the second oldest profession.
I have learned that it bears a striking resemblance to the first'

- Ronald Reagan

 

[Foreigner]

An honest politician is like a breath of hot air.

- Anon

 

[Foreigner]

It is possible for one never to transgress a single law and still be a cough.

Some of us think holding on makes us strong; but sometimes it is letting go.


- Hermann Hesse

 

[Foreigner]

"Being entirely honest with oneself is a good exercise."

Sigmund Freud

 

[Major]

"Your food stamps will be stopped effective March 1992 because we received notice that you passed away. May God bless you. You may reapply if there is a change in your circumstances."



--Department of Social Services, Greenville , South Carolina

 

[Major]

"I love California . I practically grew up in Phoenix ..."



-- Dan Quayle

 

[Major]

"It isn't pollution that's harming the environment. It's the impurities in our air and water that are doing it.."



--Al Gore

 

[drron]

Not sure I should quote this one-
"More men die of their remedies than their illnesses."

Moliere

 

[JohnM]

Spotted today on the back of a Wicked campervan:

I love Jesus - it's his fan club that makes me nervous.

 

[Foreigner]

"The only people who never fail are those who never try."

- ilka chase

 

[Foreigner]

“OCTOBER: This is one of the peculiarly dangerous months to speculate in stocks. The others are July, January, September, April, November, May, March, June, December, August, and February.”

- Mark Twain

 

[Foreigner]

"When asked what surprised him most about humanity, answered, ‘Man. Because he sacrifices his health in order to make money. Then he sacrifices money to recuperate his health. And then he is so anxious about the future that he does not enjoy the present; the result being that he does not live in the the present or the future; he lives as if he is never going to die, and then dies having never really lived.’"

- purportedly by the Delai Lama but could have been a hoax.

 

[Foreigner]

"If you've got them by the balls, their hearts and minds will follow."

- unknown, though some said this was said first in the US military, Senate, The White House, et al.

 

[serfty]

"If you've got them by the balls, their hearts and minds will follow."

- unknown, though some said this was said first in the US military, Senate, The White House, et al.

I believe it was generally noticed first on a plaque in the office of "Charles Colsen", a Nixon staffer - the Plaque was supposed to have come from a Green Beret.


On a similar theme there was LBJ - Who is supposed to have said: " I never trust a man unless I've got his pecker in my pocket!".

 

[Major]

Heaven is Where:

The Police are British,

The Chefs are Italian,

The Mechanics are German,

The Lovers are French,

and

It's all organized by the Swiss.


Hell is Where:

The Police are German,

The Chefs are British,

The Mechanics are French,

The Lovers are Swiss,

and

It's all organized by the Italians.

 

[Maca44]

"I'm almost positive"
Source: my ex wife.


Also,

Witnesses can lie, circumstances can't.
I believe it was Justice O'Keefe in Sydney Supreme Court.

 

[Major]

whatever
hits the fan will
not be distributed evenly.

 

[Foreigner]

Never trust a crying woman and a smiling man.

- Russian proverb

 

[Foreigner]

"It has long been recognized that the problems with alcohol relate not to the use of a bad thing, but to the abuse of a good thing."

- Abraham Lincoln

 

[Foreigner]

[h=1]“If slaughterhouses had glass walls, everyone would be a vegetarian.”[/h]Sir Paul McCartney

...



You may like to see this clip from Paul McCartney:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=odgldsDVDis&feature=youtube_gdata_player