A bit of humour

[Bundy Bear]

Brain cells, hair cells, and skin cells, they all die constantly, but fat cells seem to have an eternal life.

 

[Major]

On the back of a German bus

 

[love_the_life]

On the back of a German bus

View attachment 134846

Unfortunate

 

[JessicaTam]

Unfortunate

Or on purpose?

 

[love_the_life]

Or on purpose?

Of course but a little tacky No doubt whoever designed it though it was clever.

 

[mrs.dr.ron]

 

[Dr Bob]

Vet students & the dead cow.

First-year students at the University Vet school were receiving their first anatomy class, with a real dead cow.
They all gathered around the table with the cow body covered with a white sheet. The professor started the class by telling them, 'In Veterinary Medicine it is necessary to have two important qualities as a veterinarian: The first is that you not be disgusted by anything involving the animal body.' For an example, the Professor pulled back the sheet, stuck his finger in the butt of the dead cow, withdrew it and stuck his finger in his mouth.
'Go ahead and do the same thing,' he told his students. The students freaked out, hesitated for several minutes, but eventually took turns sticking a finger in the cow's anus and then sucking on it.
When everyone was finished, the Professor looked at them and said, 'The second most important quality is observation. I stuck in my middle finger and sucked on my index finger.' 'Now learn to pay attention. Life's tough, it's even tougher if you are stupid.'

 

[love_the_life]

Vet students & the dead cow.

First-year students at the University Vet school were receiving their first anatomy class, with a real dead cow.
They all gathered around the table with the cow body covered with a white sheet. The professor started the class by telling them, 'In Veterinary Medicine it is necessary to have two important qualities as a veterinarian: The first is that you not be disgusted by anything involving the animal body.' For an example, the Professor pulled back the sheet, stuck his finger in the butt of the dead cow, withdrew it and stuck his finger in his mouth.
'Go ahead and do the same thing,' he told his students. The students freaked out, hesitated for several minutes, but eventually took turns sticking a finger in the cow's anus and then sucking on it.
When everyone was finished, the Professor looked at them and said, 'The second most important quality is observation. I stuck in my middle finger and sucked on my index finger.' 'Now learn to pay attention. Life's tough, it's even tougher if you are stupid.'

An oldie but a goodie. Have heard the same joke in a variety of guises, including a beaker or urine and science students.

 

[cambriamarsh]

Picked up a hitchhiker last night. He said "Thanks! But how do you know I'm not a serial killer?" I replied "The chances of two serial killers being in the same car are astronomical". Silence.

 

[Captain Halliday]

It’s been a tough week. Many dramas at work and home.

I don’t think vodka is the answer, but it’s worth a shot!

 

[Deleted member]

An oldie but a goodie. Have heard the same joke in a variety of guises, including a beaker or urine and science students.

Reg Drayton used to do the same trick with people on his winery tour

 

[Scr77]

WARNING - Crude and bad language.

 

[sagittariusdrake]

These privacy setting options sound just like my therapist when discussing my issues

Mea culpa: Sourced from Twitter

 

[Hvr]

What do you call a camel with no hump?



Bear with me.




Humphrey.

 

[Hvr]

Police are on the trail of a serial killer who's murdered several victims using knitting needles. They believe he is following some kind of pattern.

 

[JessicaTam]

Police are on the trail of a serial killer who's murdered several victims using knitting needles. They believe he is following some kind of pattern.

That one left me in stitches! It was a pearler. Better than your usual yarns.

 

[Flashback]

Groan!

 

[love_the_life]

That one left me in stitches! It was a pearler. Better than your usual yarns.

Police are on the trail of a serial killer who's murdered several victims using knitting needles. They believe he is following some kind of pattern.

Oh dear, not sure which post deserves the boom boom.

 

[QF WP]

Oh my, I've just finished reading @Hvr's jokes. Where does he get them?

 

[Hvr]

Oh my, I've just finished reading @Hvr's jokes. Where does he get them?

From work, there is a new joke posted every few days,