The totally off-topic thread

[serfty]

Hmm...

Nothing off-topic to mention.

How about some non topic stuff?

 

[sully]

To strip back a concrete floor you need to use a machine that has a rotating metal plate to which are attached diamond coated disks. Propel the machine in a series of small arcs, moving forward as a continuous but evenly slow rate. Always use a vacuum unit attached to the grinder and wear protective clothing. Take regular breaks to avoid fatigue and be sure to empty the vacuum before returning it to the hire company else a cleaning surcharge will apply.

If you need to be contacted on your mobile remember that you will not be able to hear it ring so put it onto the vibrate setting and place it in a position on your person that will be able to respond. I leave the positioning to individual taste and discretion.

I drank solo and water but any other non-alcoholic drink is accetable for rehydration during the task. After showering administer James Squire IPA or Little Creatures Pale Ale. Pilsner Urquell is a more than aceeptable international alternative and if you would like something with a bit more malt and less hop profile then go for a Fullers London Pride. The combination of fuggles and goldings hops with the mildy burtonised water is a treat to behold.

Make sure you wear comfortable loose cloting after showering to ensure that you are well relaxed and there is no restriction of blood flow.

 

[Yada Yada]

:shock: right.....

 

[Kiwi Flyer]

To strip back a concrete floor you need to use a machine that has a rotating metal plate to which are attached diamond coated disks. Propel the machine in a series of small arcs, moving forward as a continuous but evenly slow rate. Always use a vacuum unit attached to the grinder and wear protective clothing. Take regular breaks to avoid fatigue and be sure to empty the vacuum before returning it to the hire company else a cleaning surcharge will apply.

If you need to be contacted on your mobile remember that you will not be able to hear it ring so put it onto the vibrate setting and place it in a position on your person that will be able to respond. I leave the positioning to individual taste and discretion.

I drank solo and water but any other non-alcoholic drink is accetable for rehydration during the task. After showering administer James Squire IPA or Little Creatures Pale Ale. Pilsner Urquell is a more than aceeptable international alternative and if you would like something with a bit more malt and less hop profile then go for a Fullers London Pride. The combination of fuggles and goldings hops with the mildy burtonised water is a treat to behold.

Make sure you wear comfortable loose cloting after showering to ensure that you are well relaxed and there is no restriction of blood flow.

If you're writing this for merican audience at risk of suing you for all you got, you left out some important bits.

Not to be operated while under the influence of alcohol or drugs.

 

[NM]

:shock: right.....

Or left, depending upon your point of view

 

[sully]

Which is exactly what I am. When I use tools in both hands I prefer to refer to myself as ambisinistral.

If you filled in for the other team in a game of cricket does that mean you bat for both sides?

 

[Kiwi Flyer]

When I use tools in both hands I prefer to refer to myself as ambisinistral.

Thats a big word for this early in the week.

If both hands are on the tools :shock: how do you answer the mobile ph?

 

[sully]

Let it ring but keep a smile on my face.

 

[NM]

Which is exactly what I am. When I use tools in both hands I prefer to refer to myself as ambisinistral.

I'd give my right arm to be ambidextrous .

 

[sully]

You would then need an ambilence.

 

[Kiwi Flyer]

which has a bad ambience - dang sirens

 

[sully]

I saw a bloke being arrested for road rage the other day. He was driving a vehicle marked "Patient Transport". Hypocrite.

 

[Kiwi Flyer]

I saw a bloke being arrested for road rage the other day. He was driving a vehicle marked "Patient Transport". Hypocrite.

I saw a long truck the other day with a car in front. Sign said "Pilot Vehicle". And here I thought the truck was on autodrive (ala simpons episode) :shock:

 

[sully]

I find interstate truck drivers to be quite articulate.

 

[NM]

I love the road signs that state "Road Plant Ahead". I am yet to see the plants that are used grow roads. Are they trees or shrubs? Or do they grow them like grass in an open paddock and transplant them to the place we need to drive?

 

[sully]

I once photographed my kids in front of a 'Slow Children' sign. The government agreed and I now get a total of $414.32 a fortnight.

 

[Kiwi Flyer]

I love the road signs that state "Road Plant Ahead". I am yet to see the plants that are used grow roads. Are they trees or shrubs? Or do they grow them like grass in an open paddock and transplant them to the place we need to drive?

Ahh I think I see the problem. They want you to plant a head on the road.

 

[NM]

The best road sign I ever say was in the North Yorkshire Moors and read "Gan Canny for 1/3 mile".

 

[Kiwi Flyer]

"Flying planes overhead"

If they're overhead I really hope they're still flying and it they're not flying then I hope they're not overhead.

 

[cabbage74]

I love the road signs that state "Road Plant Ahead". I am yet to see the plants that are used grow roads. Are they trees or shrubs? Or do they grow them like grass in an open paddock and transplant them to the place we need to drive?

Have you not seen the ad for the Mitsubishi 380?