It's official. Pierce Brosnan can't sing.
I know, I am late to the Mamma Mia party.
He also cannot be a human being.
Back when he was 007 he was in Sydney and had a very long lunch at a restaurant down at Circular Quay. We also were having our work Xmas party - all 12 of us.
The exec assistant, at 8 months pregnant was a mad but sensible fan of PB. She spent 90 minutes holding it in before she finally turned to me and asked whether I thought it would be OK if she went over to his table (him & another guy) who were sitting there enjoying the view across CQ. They'd finished eating long ago and were alternating between coffee and red wine (but not massive amounts).
My response was, they'd finished eating, she had not been gazing at PB etc etc - so there should be no harm in quietly walking up to him (as his position/table nearly directly faced her path to them) and politely asking if he could sign her menu.
This lady was around late 20s, very softly spoken, and niceness personified. Did I mention seriously pregnant and racing Xmas to see which would arrive first?
She walked across and had barely begun to speak when I (and everyone else in the restaurant) heard him very angrily and excessively loudly start abusing her:
"Just what makes you think its acceptable to come and disturb me in a restaurant? Where do you get off? Can't you just sit down and behave yourself without going and annoying someone else in a restaurant?"
Plus a few other equally pointed barbs at her expense. She hurried back in tears.
So I got up and walked across to him, stopped a metre or so short and replied more or less:
"Sorry petal the world obviously does not know how precious you are. Obviously all the PR articles your agent puts out do a very good job of disguising what a low life you are. Don't worry the financial community around the world will soon receive an update on that. I hope you have a Merry Xmas Scrooge!"
Turned around and walked back.
Biggest smile on our exec Assistant's face ever.
Was I wrong?