Win a Qantas Trinket celebrating the QF/EK partnership

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"Alan this a pic of the pavlova from the F lounge, absolutely lovely,NP has done a great job with this one"
 
To be said in your best Irish accent....

"Jeezuz Lindsay, if I'd known how much you fly with bloody virgin I would have given your ticket to Bill"
 
"Ok, I'll email you this list of AFF members for the mass joy flight of one of each of the planes in the fleet, in formation. "
 
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Alan, maaate*, bad news: surf’s down on the west coast. That pest JohnM could be back.
 
Alan, maaate*, see, told you, he’s baack! I wonder what sort of juvenile words he’s going to put in our mouths this time?
 
Alan, maaate*, this is what happens when JohnM has booked his annual DONEx and all his JASAs at Classic points for the year, picked all his 1As on the 3-class birds, lined up his FEBOs, made sure he’s AA codeshare on BA metal now that the JSA is dust, got his F upgrade requests in on the 4-class birds, just used his latest DSC offer, is waiting for T-80 on the DOM to move from 2A to 1A and the surf’s died – he gets restless and starts wasting time on AFF – unlike most AFFers who are ALWAYS on AFF wasting time while claiming to their boss they are working full time! The sooner he gets on that next bird and out of our hair, the better!
 
Alan, maaate*, if I had been giving JohnM financial advice, I would have had him so stitched up on my trail commission fees that it would have ensured he could never have afforded to retire early - or at all! - and have the time to be such a pest!
 
Alan, maaate*, it’s a message for you from JohnM. I haven’t looked at it to see what it says, but I’m sure he’ll flatter me. [Folks: this is what it says: Alan maaate^ ignore that sleazy Ponzi-scheme merchant Wilson; he’ll be into your sweet QF legacy defined benefit superannuation like a leech if you keep listening to his b-s.] (^I’m anticipating that Alan and I will be like that and Wilson will be history after my sage advice.)
 
Lindsay, maaate*, we suspect RedRoo is an AFF mole but typically bloody useless HR can’t find a genderless person on our books. What DO those f’ing dimwits do all day?! It’s the same private or government – useless pr!cks always spending all their time writing their own contracts and cases for more of them and adding numerous zeroes to their salary line! Absolute scum - but nobody has the guts to stop them and like every other CEO, department head and Secretary in the country I don’t want to fall foul of the Minister or chairman because of all those PC types on the board or in parliament that us wimps let run our lives!
 
"Do ya reckon you can fast track a QF codeshare on this flight from Dubai to Khartoum?"


DoneX followers should know the significance of that one
 
Lindsay, maaate*, we have a tip that Princess Fiona is Deep Throat for that RedRoo turncoat. What we’re going to do is bring her in to the SYD INT F lounge and pour ’02 Taittinger Comtes down that pretty little neck of hers while our elegant metrosexual stooge Rick (who’ll we’ll find easily amongst the male FAs) says fittingly “Play it, Sam.^” to the ivory-tinkler that we’ll bring in. If that doesn’t make her talk (women, especially royalty, these days can be pretty unresponsive compared with that oh-so-gorgeous Ingrid), threatening to change it to NV Moet and move her to the DOM QP is certain to make her squeal! (^For the pedants out there, it is NOT “Play it again Sam.” – see Play it again Sam).
 
Lindsay, maaate*, just take a look at this wouldya! It’s Lesley Grant’s corporate credit card statement just in for approval. She’s recently taken a bunch of freeloaders from some outfit called AFF out for lunch at some celebrity chef’s joint. Look at the b-s in the justification: answering their puerile questions! As if we would tell those suckers in advance how we’re going to enhance them! What does she think she’s doing?! Maaate* - I’m telling ya now, boyo, when you grow up don’t employ amateurs!
 
Geez, Lindsay, maaate*, look at the tax invoice with Lesley’s corporate credit card statement. Not only did that rogue Perry put on NZ wine, he charged us for the organic freshly-foraged water that they then shoved into plastic bottles! I tellya, maaate*, you can’t afford to take your eye off contractors and service providers for a moment!
 
Geez, Lindsay, maaate*, how’s this for gratitude?! Turns out most of those AFF rogues at Lesley’s lunch are VA WP on that mongrel outfit’s status-match! I told Lesley she should have invited that totally loyal JohnM. Bloody staff never listen! What’s that? Yeah, maaate*, I know, you have the same problem with Admin, Markis10, Straitman, NM, and Serfty, plus their weird names to put up with - but don’t tell me your problems, I have enough of my own!
 
Geez, Lindsay, maaate*, we can’t win a trick. Those Amex ratbags have just ripped the guts out of points earn on ATO and utilities spend on the QF Ultimate card. Just when I’ve been telling the team to load up so we can get ourselves a few FASAs under the belt! Even told ops to stick the JetA1 on it down at the Woolies servos! Bugger ‘em, they can shove their free flight!
 
Virgin? VIRGIN?! Lindsay, maaate*, that’s a bloody dirty rotten misnomer! It’s time to take those b@stards to the TPC; they’ve been screwing us over ever since I took on this gig!
 
Hey Alan, maaate*, that Greggsy’s a chump! He was thinking 20+1 would have done it for JohnM’s ridiculous posts on this absurd thread. Little did he know that the smart@rse had a few more up his damned sleeve! He could have really cleaned us out if he set the bar higher!
 
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