A bit of humour

[straitman]

An American decided to write a book about famous churches around the world.

So he bought a plane ticket and took a trip to Orlando, Florida, thinking that he would start by working his way across the USA from south to north.

On his first day he was inside a church taking photographs when he noticed a golden telephone mounted on the wall with a sign that read '$10,000 per call'.

The American, being intrigued, asked a priest who was strolling by what the telephone was used for.

The priest replied that it was a direct line to heaven and that for $10,000 you could talk to God.

The American thanked the priest and went along his way.

Next stop was in Atlanta, Georgia. There, at a very large cathedral, he saw the same looking golden telephone with the same sign under it.

He wondered if this was the same kind of telephone he saw in Orlando and he asked a nearby nun what its purpose was.

She told him that it was a direct line to heaven and that for $10,000 he could talk to God.

'OK, thankyou,' said the American .

He then travelled all across America, Europe, England, Japan, New Zealand. In every church he saw the same looking golden telephone with the same '$US10,000 per call' sign under it.

The American decided to travel to Australia to see if Australians had the same phone.

He arrived at the Gold Coast, in Australia and again, in the first church he entered, there was the same looking golden telephone, but this time the sign under it read '40 cents per call.'

The American was surprised so he asked the priest about the sign. 'Father, I've travelled all over the world and I've seen this same golden telephone in many churches. I'm told that it is a direct line to Heaven, but in all of them price was $10,000 per call.

Why is it so cheap here?'

The priest smiled and answered, 'You're in Australia now, mate. This is God's country - it's a local call'.

KEEP SMILING

If you are proud to be an Aussie pass this on!
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[drron]

You can expect this treatment from now on in the Labour Party if you are naughty ..................[FONT=Times
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[serfty]

Hmmm ... cant see anything

[FONT=Times
 New Roman][SIZE=3][COLOR=black][COLOR=black][URL="http://www.incredimail.com/app/?tag=emoticon_click_me_im2_re&lang=9&version=6104631&setup_id=7&aff_id=102&tID=601634&addon=IncrediMail&upn=ea87b456-7cf9-4623-9dde-dd76a1d288d6&id=95202&guid=85B70CB7-7485-48CB-8D26-A1CEDF0589F7"][IMG]http://au.mg5.mail.yahoo.com/ya/download?mid=1%5f73834%5fAGtaimIAAVB6Tbfq6g4oLWKJ628&pid=2.2&fid=Inbox&inline=1[/IMG][/URL] [/COLOR][/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT][/FONT][/COLOR][FONT=Arial][COLOR=black][COLOR=black][FONT=arial]
[/FONT][/COLOR][/COLOR][/FONT][FONT=Arial][SIZE=2][COLOR=#1f497d][COLOR=#1F497D][FONT=arial]  [/FONT][/COLOR][/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT][FONT=Arial][COLOR=black][COLOR=black][FONT=arial]
[/FONT][/COLOR][/COLOR][/FONT][FONT=Arial][SIZE=2][COLOR=#1f497d][COLOR=#1F497D][FONT=arial][URL="http://www.facebook.com/photo.php?pid=30607370&id=1266461368"][IMG]http://au.mg5.mail.yahoo.com/ya/download?mid=1%5f73834%5fAGtaimIAAVB6Tbfq6g4oLWKJ628&pid=2.3&fid=Inbox&inline=1[/IMG][/URL][/FONT][/COLOR][/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT]

 

[drmikki]

Hmmm ... cant see anything

Maybe that was drron's joke?

(I can't see anything either...)

 

[drron]

Still there for me.Try again-

 

[anat0l]

Still there for me.Try again-
...

The link you've made is from a Yahoo mail message which links to a picture in Facebook.

Tried the Facebook link with no success - get a "Content Not Found" message. Most likely this means the photo isn't visible to everyone, hence you need to befriend the owner to get at the picture.


But hey, all talk and no goods - I guess that's what we expect of the Labour government. Oh wait, we expect that of any government.....

 

[straitman]

You can expect this treatment from now on in the Labour Party if you are naughty ..................[FONT=Times
New Roman] [/FONT]

Using IE I get a link to Facebook which I don't use so I will never see the result.

Using Mozilla I get nothing :!: :shock:

 

[drron]

The funny thing is I see the photo in your quote Bill even though I am now using a work computer not my own.The other funny thing is that this was sent to me by an 82 year old woman.when I get home tonight I will do a work around so hopefully everyone will see.
ain't technology grand!

 

[anat0l]

The funny thing is I see the photo in your quote Bill even though I am now using a work computer not my own.The other funny thing is that this was sent to me by an 82 year old woman.when I get home tonight I will do a work around so hopefully everyone will see.
ain't technology grand!

You are probably Facebook friends with the woman (who I must applaud is able to and is using Facebook). As you are entitled to see her photos (which, IIRC, default privacy settings only allow photos to be viewed by friends), this is why it works for you.

For the rest of us who are not friends, all we see is a blank. Chasing the link back to the original Facebook picture tells us the content doesn't exist (when it probably does, it's just that we have no right to see it).

 

[QF WP]

Nicely worked through anat0l. I understood that explanation

 

[straitman]

Nicely worked through anat0l. I understood that explanation

Turning into a computer geeky sort of person now are we LW :?:

 

[anat0l]

Turning into a computer geeky sort of person now are we LW :?:

Is that supposed to be humorous?

 

[straitman]

Is that supposed to be humorous?

It depends upon your perspective.

 

[drron]

No but my knowledge of computers is laughable.So here goes via picassaweb-

 

[Flashback]

LOL! It's even funnier, because it's scanned in from a piece of paper :mrgreen:

 

[drron]

LOL! It's even funnier, because it's scanned in from a piece of paper :mrgreen:

Nothing high tech about me!

 

[QF WP]

Turning into a computer geeky sort of person now are we LW :?:

Is that supposed to be humorous?

It depends upon your perspective.

No, I was actually wanting to compliment anat0l for his explanation, sometimes I can gave good days

 

[QF WP]

Puns for Educated Minds

1. The fattest knight at King Arthur's round table was Sir coughference. He acquired his size from too much pi.

2. I thought I saw an eye doctor on an Alaskan island, but it turned out to be an optical Aleutian .

3. She was only a whiskey maker, but he loved her still.

4. A rubber band pistol was confiscated from algebra class, because it was a weapon of math disruption.

5. No matter how much you push the envelope, it'll still be stationery.

6. A dog gave birth to puppies near the road and was cited for littering.

7. A grenade thrown into a kitchen in France would result in Linoleum Blownapart

8. Two silk worms had a race.. They ended up in a tie.

9. A hole has been found in the nudist camp wall. The police are looking into it.

10. Time flies like an arrow. Fruit flies like a banana.

11. Atheism is a non-prophet organization.

12. Two hats were hanging on a hat rack in the hallway. One hat said to the other: 'You stay here; I'll go on a head.'

13. I wondered why the baseball kept getting bigger. Then it hit me.

14. A sign on the lawn at a drug rehab center said: 'Keep off the Grass.'

15. The midget fortune-teller who escaped from prison was a small medium at large.

16. The soldier who survived mustard gas and pepper spray is now a seasoned veteran.

17. A backward poet writes inverse.

18. In a democracy it's your vote that counts. In feudalism it's your count that votes.

19. When cannibals ate a missionary, they got a taste of religion.

20. If you jumped off the bridge in Paris , you'd be in Seine .

21. A vulture boards an airplane, carrying two dead raccoons. The stewardess looks at him and says, 'I'm sorry, sir, only one carrion allowed per passenger.'

22. Two fish swim into a concrete wall.. One turns to the other and says 'Dam!'

23. Two Eskimos sitting in a kayak were chilly, so they lit a fire in the craft. Unsurprisingly it sank, proving once again that you can't have your kayak and heat it too.

24. Two hydrogen atoms meet. One says, 'I've lost my electron.' The other says 'Are you sure?' The first replies, 'Yes, I'm positive.'

25. Did you hear about the Buddhist who refused Novocain during a root canal? His goal: transcend dental medication.

 

[QF WP]

Here is something to help make Gillard's speeches almost tolerable. Just print this page, distribute it to friends, and listen to her next speech (be sure to read directions at the bottom).

Rules for Bull**** Bingo:
1. Before Julia Gillard's next televised speech, print your "Bull**** Bingo"
2. Check off the appropriate block when you hear one of those words/phrases.
3. When you get five blocks horizontally, vertically, or diagonally, stand up and shout "BULL****!"

 

[anat0l]

Here is something to help make Gillard's speeches almost tolerable. Just print this page, distribute it to friends, and listen to her next speech (be sure to read directions at the bottom).

Rules for Bull**** Bingo:
1. Before Julia Gillard's next televised speech, print your "Bull**** Bingo"
2. Check off the appropriate block when you hear one of those words/phrases.
3. When you get five blocks horizontally, vertically, or diagonally, stand up and shout "BULL****!"

It may help to employ the assistance of someone with some technical capability to actually see the bingo card and make the joke worthwhile.